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Begin Again

A couple of weeks ago, I thought “I have to do something. I need to make some changes. I need to make plans.” I wasn’t taking care of myself. I wasn’t being productive. Some days I was consumed by anxiety. And I’ve said to myself time and time again, “This is it. I’m really going to change. Get healthy. Work on projects, etc.” Well I’m here again. LOL. But this time I feel more confident, more excited, and optimistic about this refresh, restart or whatever you want to call it. I’ve started making a routine using a digital planner (I’ll share a post later) where I make time to do things that I need to do such as working out and doing some online work for income. But to also have time to have fun, read books, catch up on some hobbies.

I have also worked on revising my social media sites, especially this blog. Part of the problem with not keeping up or constantly redoing this blog was that I was overwhelmed with what I wanted to share and how I wanted to share it. I was obsessed with making it “perfect”. So I decided I’m simply going to share different aspects my life. Things I’m doing, things I’m thinking. And I’m categorizing it into three areas: life in general, spirituality, and health. This time I’m not going to make any plans for upload scheduling. I’m just going to go with the flow.

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Health and Happiness

It’s been a long time since I posted anything here (over two years actually—cringe). I have been dealing with a constant cycle of anxiety and depression and these last two years have been one of the worse times. But I decided that I am done with it, and I was determined to gain back control of my life. After a short trip home in February,  I decided that I was ready to move back home to the states. I should have moved back years ago but due to a laziness that sometimes develops out of living comfortably or conveniently, I constantly tried to convince myself that I was better off living here. The reality is, I was living an unhappy life and in my opinion one with very little value. I wanted to be physically close to my friends and family. I wanted to be able to drive a few minutes or even a couple of hours to visit people. Older family members were only getting older, and some with declining health, and I didn’t want to miss out on spending more time with them. I also grew tired of the noisy, impatient, and selfish behavior that often plagues big, bustling cities like here in Seoul. I missed the quiet and easy pace of my much smaller hometown.

I have been taking steps to really start taking care of myself. From the end of April, I have been eating healthier and recording my calorie intake per day. I had also starting working out, three times a week initially, then daily after a couple of weeks. Sure, I had days where I binged or the weekends where I stayed home all day and sometimes skipped working out but I still felt good. Certainly much more better than I had been doing in the past two or three years. I was determined to get my happiness and health back. I have also been working on taking better care of my skin. I stopped using and keeping products that I didn’t enjoy using and I have created a skincare plan as a visual way to keep me on track as well. I have tweaked it a bit the past couple of weeks but for the most part I have been consistent with it.

I have also been better with my shopping habits. I realized years ago that I mostly shopped as a coping mechanism to my anxiety. Now I buy things that really need or if it’s something I want, I make sure I will use it and that it is of good quality.

As far as this blog is concern, I am planning on redirecting its focus, maybe making it a general blog. I’m working on a new header and maybe a new logo. I like my current logo but maybe with this refresh on life, it would be good to change it as well.